Punky is a good kid. Mostly. I mean, she's three and often very good at it. She has the occasional tantrum, some typical acts of defiance, the expected exertion of her independence here and there. But on the whole, she is a sweet, loving, polite, respectful little girl.
Until recently.
Lately she been falling more in the demanding, ungrateful, unappreciative, spoiled brat category. Just in time for Christmas and her birthday. And I don't know how to fix it without doing something drastic.
I've always tried to explain to Punky that she is a very lucky girl. Granted we really don't have much and basically live paycheck to paycheck, but it's still a hell of a lot more than many people have these days. She has food in her belly, clothes on her back, a cozy home, more than enough toys for one child, and we go places and do things regularly. Even though she's very young, I've tried to explain the concept of money and how sometimes it's necessary to make decisions about how you spend it based on what's needed and what we can do without. She made her first purchase with her very own money a few weeks ago, a new baby doll, and so far she treats the doll like gold.
We talk often about kids less fortunate than her. We talk about how great it was that she participated in a trike-athon at school and raised over a hundred dollars for the sick kids at St. Jude's. We talk about the importance of sharing with those in need, and she never passes up the opportunity to toss some spare change into a charity collection bucket, whenever I have some in my pocket that is.
When she asks for something at the store, the answer is often no. But sometimes it's yes, like when she's been exceptionally good, when I have the extra cash, when she asks for something educational like a book. Up until recently, the answer didn't matter. Either way, she was okay with it. No arguing, no tantrums, no snotty attitude. Lately we haven't been so lucky.
When someone gave her something, be it a toy, or clothes, or a book from a yard sale, she would be thrilled and appreciative and always said thank-you without having to be told. She didn't expect people to give her things, so her surprise always added to the excitement. The last time she saw her godfather, she asked him right out if he had anything for her, like he always does, before he even had a chance to take off his coat. And I almost went through the roof.
She just started watching TV with commercials in the last few months, and now she wants everything she sees. The ads opened a whole new world of want for her, and I don't like it one bit. I mean, I know she's three and all, and it's not really the fact that she wants things, it's more the attitude that accompanies that want. It's like she feels the world somehow owes her these things, and denying her them, no matter the reason, sets off a pissing, moaning, whining, groaning, stomping, yelling tantrum.
I'm really at a loss here. I don't know how to handle it. I'm always as honest as I can be without burdening her with issues beyond her years. I don't want her to act like a spoiled rotten little brat, but I don't know what else I can possibly say at this point. If she were older, I'd drag her to a soup kitchen to help out for a day but three's a bit too young for that. I'm at my wits end, seriously.
I suppose there's a chance she's acting totally normal for her age, and it's just a phase like the hundreds of others she's endured thus far, and it's simply something she needs to go through and grow out of over time, but I can't help my impatience. I guess all I can do is keep reinforcing the lessons I've been trying to teach her since birth.
She knows Christmas and her birthday are right around the corner. And I know, as I have every year, about the wall of stuff about to hit our house and a part of me is dreading it. I obviously want her to be happy, and I love seeing her little face light up when she gets something she's really wanted, but this time of the year is overkill on presents. I'm not exactly sure how I'll respond if she reacts poorly to any gift she's given, or if she carries on because she didn't get something she wants, or if she doesn't like something and has the audacity to say so. Mommy's likely to lose her shit.
This parenting stuff is hard sometimes. It's a never-ending chain of crises and dilemmas, but I wouldn't trade it for the world. Seems like every time I think I have it all figured out, a new problem comes out of nowhere and punches me in the gut. This one in particular really has my panties in a bunch, and even more so now since we found out today that her dad is laid off from work, effective immediately. He thought he would be safe until after the holidays but we weren't that lucky, as usual. Things are going to get ugly quick come January, so I suppose I should just let Punky enjoy all the spoiling she gets in the next few weeks. We have some extremely rough months ahead of us.
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