Today You Are Four

Dear Punky,

I can hardly believe that title.  Four.  It's amazing how quickly time passes.

As I sit here in complete silence, my mind can't help but drift back to your birth and the nineteen long hours of labor leading up to it.  I suppose it's normal to remember those excruciating moments every year on your birthday.  I guess it's what most moms do, no?

Even though I saved my very last vacation day of the year to have today off for your birthday, you went to school.  You wanted to go.  You wanted to bring cupcakes in for the class, and hear them sing to you, and pick a special surprise out of the birthday chest like the other kids all got to do on their birthdays.  That's okay though, I understand.  Plus, your Dad and I had big plans for the day anyway.

After we left you at school, we headed to the toy store to get you the perfect birthday present.  But things began to fall apart before we even arrived, thanks to the ultra-convenient cell phone world we live in now, and quickly spiraled downhill from there.

Your godfather was at the emergency room last night - he has bronchitis. Your Pappy is at the hospital right now - he's very sick, too.  Your godmother is sick.  Your cousins are sick. There's a big winter storm set to hit tonight. And the toy store didn't have the present we wanted in stock.

We had to cancel your birthday party for tomorrow.

I'm so sorry, Punky.  I have to break the news to you after school and I'm dreading it.  You will be so disappointed and heartbroken.  Believe me, I am, too.

But I promise, as soon as the weather breaks and everyone is feeling better, you will have the best birthday party we can manage.  And your Dad is en route right now to another toy store an hour and a half away to get you the present we planned on buying this morning.  By the time you get home from school, he'll be back.

While I have a rare window of quiet time alone, it's the perfect opportunity to write this birthday post.  Three was certainly a challenging age, for both of us, and I'm excited to see what four has in store for this year.

I know I tell you this all the time, but I really am so proud of who you are. You amaze me each and every day.  We are so very different, yet exactly alike in many ways.  I love watching you grow, and change, and laugh, and learn.  Through my eyes, this is who you are at four:

Adventurous, spontaneous, and downright daring at times.  You make my heart stop with your tendency to leap before looking, but there's never a dull moment around here.  You'll try anything once without hesitation, and twice if the first attempt is even remotely successful.  Even at this early age it's clear you'll never be a wallflower.  I admire your bravery, your spunk, and your persistence.

Intelligent, witty, and curious beyond belief.  You have yet to meet a fact you didn't memorize.  A far stretch from the typical kid your age, at your request we end each night with a series of questions before bed.  Addition, subtraction, spelling, and science are your favorite categories these days. You told me you want to know everything, and that you will when you're one hundred years old.  There's no doubt in my mind you'll get there.  I hope you always approach learning with the same hunger you have now.  You might just change the world some day.

Silly, funny, and a total giggle machine.  You love to laugh, and you love to make others laugh even more.  Our house is filled with the sweet sound of little girl giggles and the hiccups that follow shortly afterward.  I love how one tiny chuckle can totally change my mood and brighten my day instantly.  I love your silly, playful side.  I love that you can never brush your teeth without racing us to the bathroom.  I love that your socks never match your outfit when I let you choose the pair you want.  I love your silly faces, wacky dances, and funny stories.  Keep on laughing and inspiring others to laugh with you.  It sparks friendships, deepens bonds, and creates memories that last a lifetime.

Stubborn, independent, and impatient.  All typical for your age, but frustrating for your parents nonetheless.  Nothing makes you more angry than something you can't master in the first three seconds of trying.  Your independent streak runs deep, and your insistence on doing everything yourself makes us all crazy at times.  You want what you want when you want it, and have no patience when things don't go exactly how you envisioned it.  Unfortunately these traits likely stem from my half of your DNA profile, but hopefully you'll grow out of it.  At least some of it.  Maybe.

Your favorite things haven't changed much over the years.  You still love your blankie and sleep with it faithfully.  You still love macaroni and cheese, apples, pickles, and watermelon, but have recently discovered your love of chocolate (yes, my DNA as well).  Hershey kisses top your list of sweet treats these days, followed closely by candy canes and sweet tarts.  You have finally taken an interest in baby dolls and play with them more than your musical instruments lately.  I'm not sure what to make of this new trend, but the house is a hell of a lot quieter, that's for sure.

And, of course, at four you are still my favorite little girl on the planet.  Being your mom is the toughest job I've ever had, yet the most satisfying bar none.  There's no doubt we'll hit some potholes as we continue our journey down this road together, but I look forward to the bumps just as much as the moments of smooth sailing.  We will continue to learn and grow together. Just take it easy on us - your parents aren't exactly spring chickens, you know.

I love you, Julia Allyn.  

Happy fourth birthday!